Monday, August 2, 2010
Today’s tidbits are so random, the first one starts more than 10 years ago and even more miles away from the Soldiers Home:
1) When I was an editor at The News Tribune in Tacoma, I took a field trip to McNeil Island to learn about the prison and its media protocol. We were meeting with the warden, so I wore a skirt to look “professional.” It probably wasn’t a bad idea for the 20 minutes we were in the warden’s office, but once we started touring the prisoner cellblocks, it suddenly seemed very ill-advised. I gravitate to editing because I am an introvert; I do not like attention. And you know what? A skirt + a woman + a prison = very uncomfortable attention.
I hadn’t recalled that experience in years—and then I wore shorts to Bingo. Last summer, when it was 80 outside, it was 180 in the Bingo room. That’s what I remembered. (First, for the record: It isn’t like I wore Daisy Dukes, for crying out loud. My thighs are the size of old-growth timber. Trust me; they were covered.) Anyway, I didn’t think anything about it at first, other than, “Ahh. I am not roasting.” But then Leo made a remark about me “running around in that getup,” Mike came in and made a point of blatantly staring lower than usual, and suddenly I became horribly self-conscious. And, to top it off, this time the air-conditioner was working just fine, thank you very much—it wasn’t the slightest bit hot in there. The next time I saw him, Mike specifically mentioned the stupid shorts, and I told him I had learned my lesson, and I’d felt ridiculous in them. “You shouldn’t,” he smirked. “You raised a lot of morale around here in those things.”
2) Covered like an Amish woman, I dropped in today hoping to catch a Trivia session. It’d been a long time since my schedule and Mike’s sleep patterns had meshed at 1:30 on a Monday—and for a minute there, I thought we were doomed again today. Mike was asleep, but he stirred the minute I walked in. “It’s Trivia day!” he exclaimed, and we were off.
There was a big turnout today—a group who’d just been golfing at American Lake was still in the Activities area for lunch, and the table around Robert the Trivia reader was full. I realized at about Question No. 7 that I was not going to contribute much, correct-answer-wise, so I assumed responsibility for killing two flies that were bugging us. This amused Mike and me almost as much as the Trivia questions—I couldn’t swat one while it was on anybody else, but as soon as it landed on Mike, it was fair game.
David Fox was a Trivia star today (“He’s a smart one, that Foxy,” Mike said), but my favorite part is when Robert bungles a question, or repeats an especially tricky one. “Say again,” he always announces, and then… he says it again.
3) Mike’s wheelchair is broken. Again. We’re starting to think it is cursed.
4) I brought a birthday card for Stan today, but he was nowhere to be found, so I left it on his bed. He had told me at Bingo that warm summer day that it was his birthday, and then one of his kids called and he left to get the phone—which gave him the perfect opportunity to notice my stupid shorts. Good grief. Yep. I think I have finally learned that lesson.
Today’s tidbits are so random, the first one starts more than 10 years ago and even more miles away from the Soldiers Home:
1) When I was an editor at The News Tribune in Tacoma, I took a field trip to McNeil Island to learn about the prison and its media protocol. We were meeting with the warden, so I wore a skirt to look “professional.” It probably wasn’t a bad idea for the 20 minutes we were in the warden’s office, but once we started touring the prisoner cellblocks, it suddenly seemed very ill-advised. I gravitate to editing because I am an introvert; I do not like attention. And you know what? A skirt + a woman + a prison = very uncomfortable attention.
I hadn’t recalled that experience in years—and then I wore shorts to Bingo. Last summer, when it was 80 outside, it was 180 in the Bingo room. That’s what I remembered. (First, for the record: It isn’t like I wore Daisy Dukes, for crying out loud. My thighs are the size of old-growth timber. Trust me; they were covered.) Anyway, I didn’t think anything about it at first, other than, “Ahh. I am not roasting.” But then Leo made a remark about me “running around in that getup,” Mike came in and made a point of blatantly staring lower than usual, and suddenly I became horribly self-conscious. And, to top it off, this time the air-conditioner was working just fine, thank you very much—it wasn’t the slightest bit hot in there. The next time I saw him, Mike specifically mentioned the stupid shorts, and I told him I had learned my lesson, and I’d felt ridiculous in them. “You shouldn’t,” he smirked. “You raised a lot of morale around here in those things.”
2) Covered like an Amish woman, I dropped in today hoping to catch a Trivia session. It’d been a long time since my schedule and Mike’s sleep patterns had meshed at 1:30 on a Monday—and for a minute there, I thought we were doomed again today. Mike was asleep, but he stirred the minute I walked in. “It’s Trivia day!” he exclaimed, and we were off.
There was a big turnout today—a group who’d just been golfing at American Lake was still in the Activities area for lunch, and the table around Robert the Trivia reader was full. I realized at about Question No. 7 that I was not going to contribute much, correct-answer-wise, so I assumed responsibility for killing two flies that were bugging us. This amused Mike and me almost as much as the Trivia questions—I couldn’t swat one while it was on anybody else, but as soon as it landed on Mike, it was fair game.
David Fox was a Trivia star today (“He’s a smart one, that Foxy,” Mike said), but my favorite part is when Robert bungles a question, or repeats an especially tricky one. “Say again,” he always announces, and then… he says it again.
3) Mike’s wheelchair is broken. Again. We’re starting to think it is cursed.
4) I brought a birthday card for Stan today, but he was nowhere to be found, so I left it on his bed. He had told me at Bingo that warm summer day that it was his birthday, and then one of his kids called and he left to get the phone—which gave him the perfect opportunity to notice my stupid shorts. Good grief. Yep. I think I have finally learned that lesson.
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